Friday, April 23, 2010

God's Plan for Me

I've tried for weeks now to sit down and write on my blog. But atlas, no posts. I miss it dearly, but something inside of me just couldn't form the words.

I've tried half a dozen times to upload a picture and write, but nothing. Don't get me wrong...it isn't that the kids aren't doing the cutest things or we aren't enjoying family adventures, I've just dealt with a lot of change. I think often change is considered bad, but in my case it has good and part of God's plan for me.

I was a exclusive stay-at-home mom for four and half years. At times, I think "Really that long?" and other times I wish it was more. Being a full-time stay-at-home mom has its perks and disadvantages. I remember thinking how lucky I was to sit outside as my kids danced in the sprinkler on the nicest day of the year instead of in a office. I also remember play groups, library hour, and mini field trips of exploration in the middle of a Wednesday afternoon. On the flip side, I also remember thinking "Now what?" at 9 a.m. on a Tuesday or the blank look from a new acquaintance when I explained I was a stay-at-home mom.

I did love being with my kids and helping them get a strong rooted foundation in life, but I knew it was time for me. I think that is the hardest part of being a wife and mother. You constantly want to give, give, give to your husband and children. But at the end of the day you forget another important person...you. It is a tricky balance and one I still am mastering.

By design, I am a busy person. I love communicating with others and having multiple projects to oversee. I began my career in the corporate world for Target and never imagined a world in which I would willingly stay home with kids, let alone have kids. So often I think we determine our life paths, but it is really God who is the master puppeteer. When we moved to Washington nearly five years ago, my plan was to get settled in and look for work in 6 months. As part of God's plan I stayed home full-time for 4 and half years and part-time for another year after that.

Working full-time again has been a blessing. We are less stressed about finances, my kids have grown confidence being away from me, and I really am able to soar again. But there has also been a transition. I'm learning how to keep the house picked up, when to do laundry, revamping my recipes for easier prep or conversion to croc pot, and most of all time management.

There is a new rhythm in our house, but I couldn't be happier. I can effectively be the person God designed me for at work and am a better mother since I'm not with my kids 100% of the time. I'm right where God planted me.

From inside the little blue bungalow,
Katie Jean
Posted by Picasa

3 comments:

Anisa @ the Schell Urban Homestead said...

Oh, KJ, I haven't the words. I am feeling a lot of what you said in this post. Right now, we (husband and I) are in negotiations on putting Henry in preschool. I want to and he doesn't. No one knows how tough it can be to be home all day, and how wonderful too. Thanks.

Anonymous said...

And you're blooming! Keep brightening your corner of the world. MOM

my2boys1&2 said...

Don't forget that is why they made vacation days. I still surprise the kids with day offs! (Yes we do take them out of school.)
You will get it down. Of course there are good and bad to every situation, but the biggest thing is to make the best of what you have and it sounds like that is what you are doing. We all are just trying to do just that.
Love ya!
Your sis